Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
