Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
