They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
