We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
