let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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