Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
and you fell through a lawn chair
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
