It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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