Sry I called you an 8
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
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