You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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