She's JV to your varsity
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize