She said her name was "party"
barbara walters just said penis...
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize