Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
