Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
