She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
