first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
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