they need to just BURY HIM!
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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