I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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