Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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