Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
