Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
