He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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