dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
