Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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