I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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