sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Randomize
