Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
