We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
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