he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
