I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize