the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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