So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
