Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I licked your asshole in confidence.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
