It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
