no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
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