so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
