dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
