my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
The struggles of a small town man whore
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
