O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
