cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize
