small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
