hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Randomize
