I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
