We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
