It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
