i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
