i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I am midnight drunk by noon
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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