I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
