So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
So vagazzling was a success
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
