I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
