I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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